When we think of Columbia, we tend to think of its tight knit communities, single family homes, and kids enjoying the natural expanses. However, it is full of singles, single parents, college students, and elders, all of whom may face a particularly isolating experience during the COVID-19 pandemic. 

The changes that have accompanied the virus have many of us reevaluating aspects of how we conduct our personal and professional lives. For single Columbians, a healthy perspective can begin a constructive and meaningful change during what can otherwise feel like a stagnant time. 

Isolation is a sobering reality for many living alone.   The pandemic poses unique challenges to singles in the area who are accustomed to an active social life. The safety measures in place to protect us don’t have to derail you socially, mentally, or physically. In fact, this can be an opportunity to develop and grow according to Dr. Marcea Whitaker, owner of In Full Bloom Health and Life Coaching and Dr. Ray Rivers of Beyond Therapy. 

Columbia Inspired first sat down with Dr. Whitaker who highlights how to manage work and isolation.

Photography Credit: Andrea A. Photography LLC. 

Columbia Inspired Magazine: What are the main concerns for single persons during the pandemic?

Dr. Marcea Whitaker: I would say the top concerns singles face are isolation, sadness, and risky behavior.

CIM: What are some characteristics of risky behavior?

MW: Great question!  Risky behaviors are those self-soothing activities that we use to buffer negative emotions such as drinking, smoking, binge watching Netflix or eating too much.  The prolonged loss of social connectedness can also trigger a rebellious, childlike state that is reactionary, like avoiding work responsibilities or disregarding established boundaries.  It could manifest as road rage, excessive dating, or neglecting advice to wear masks, or ignoring stay-at- home orders. Some find themselves exhibiting extreme behaviors in the opposite direction by not socializing altogether due to overwhelming fear.  These persons are more prone to sadness and depression.  If you find yourself or your loved ones in these states, please reach out for professional assistance. 

CIM: The pandemic obviously changes how people work, as well. How do  people manage their expectations in a vastly different work environment?

MW: We tend to look at life as if it was a Rockwell painting, in a very idealized way; One way to get through this is to take a step back and decide what you want your picture to look like. When something doesn’t feel good, decide to feel the emotion and don’t simply skip over it.  Remember, it’s okay NOT to be okay. Start by leveraging what you do have and create realistic expectations. 

CIM: What advice would you give singles who have lost or changed jobs during the pandemic?

MW: Decide what it looks like when security and accomplishment intersect. Try to plan ahead, starting at a few months and eventually, a few years, and reverse engineer the steps to the present. Choose what steps help you reach your goals; be it a class, a degree, redoing your resume, or networking. Don’t make permanent decisions based on a temporary circumstance; it is better to plan. Finally, learn to pivot. When I say pivot, I think of changing direction without losing who you are. You might have to speak out loud, share your goals and vision with others so you can start to breathe some life and accountability into your ideas.