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Columbia Inspired

Finding A Way

Jan 11, 2021 07:00PM ● By Gabrielle Lewis

When considering the quickly rising necessity for caregivers, Allyson Stanton quotes former First Lady Rosalynn Carter: “There are only four kinds of people in the world: those who have been caregivers, those who are currently caregivers, those who will be caregivers, and those who will need caregivers." 

As a lifelong advocate for vulnerable people, Stanton is no stranger to providing support to those with a limited voice. Her passion became evident as a teenager in New Jersey, serving in senior centers and working toward an extensive career that focused on the care and wellbeing of the aging population. Enamored by the wisdom and genuine connections made with her clientele, Stanton’s dedication to serving the older population in Columbia has spanned over more than two decades. Her latest role in advocacy is serving as an Aging Life Care Manager at her private clinic, Stanton Aging Solutions. Specializing in assisting loved ones with Dementia, Alzheimer’s, and other diseases that inflict cognitive decline, her life's work has been to better serve this often overlooked community. 

Stanton has been busier than ever as the older population has been encouraged to stay home and quarantine as best they can. However, the isolation brought on by the pandemic has highlighted not only the struggle in caring for others while maintaining safety guidelines, but also the shortage of resources for patients and medical professionals who serve them. Realizing their own need for care, as well as that of their loved ones, many Columbia residents have felt a newfound sense of trepidation. For a variety of reasons, difficult conversations must be had in order for patients to receive the best possible care. 

One of the most important responsibilities that Stanton has is honoring a patient’s personal history and empathizing with their life story. “When a person experiences cognitive impairment like Alzheimer’s, who they are isn’t gone,” she shares. “Alzheimer’s is a disease of the brain, not the heart or soul. Who they are is still there.” Stanton’s role is to explore who the individual patient is -- what their life experiences have been and how they would like to proceed with plans in the future. As challenging as conversations about the end of life can be, Stanton urges adult children to have these talks with their loved ones sooner rather than later. 

Stanton shares a fond memory of one of her clients from several years ago: “I worked with an older gentleman who retired and decided to wear pajamas full time. He would wear them everywhere -- the grocery store, running errands. Sometimes he would get strange looks, but he decided that after working for years that he wanted to be comfortable for his retirement.” As long as the individual person is considered first, their care can provide an environment for them to peacefully enjoy the later years in life.

The ability to make positive choices for loved ones begins with communicating early. “We don’t know our fate,” shares Stanton. “We need to be prepared for anything that can happen. How can we make choices when we’re uninformed?”


Before individuals start showing symptoms of ailments, knowledge of preference is essential. “It is important to know what your loved one wants and needs.” says Stanton. 

Important questions to ask aging parents include:

1. What are their care preferences? 
2. Who do they want to make healthcare decisions down the road? 
3. What is their financial situation? 
4. Where are their financial documents located?





Knowledge is empowerment for clients and their loved ones, and can serve as protective armor when facing an emotional battle later on. Stanton also urges adult children to take note of their aging parent’s behavior. “Changes in behavior indicate a need unmet,” Stanton informs. 

Behaviors to take note of include:

  • Memory issues

  • Skipping bill payments

  • Differences in hygiene

  • Fluctuations in weight  

Likewise, take note of emotional withdrawal. Many times self-isolating can be used as an attempt to mask other issues. By assessing differences in behavior, loved ones can mitigate the potential escalation of symptoms and provide the love and care they need. 

Knowing how to keep loved ones engaged with their community comfortably and safely is vital for their wellbeing. The Howard County Office on Aging and Independence has a collection of community resources geared to help older adults, individuals with disabilities, and caregivers find the resources they need. There are also opportunities for members of the community to get involved by assisting older individuals, from ride shares and yard work to food delivery. Stanton contends that there should be more ways for older people to engage in the community. As resources continue to develop for the elderly, Columbia residents must come together to find a way to support every sector of the community.


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